The People’s Review – The Twisted, Disturbed Life of Kane – Disc 1 & 2

The Twisted, Disturbed Life of Kane

This DVD is probably the biggest WTF? of any WWE DVD release. Kane has been around the WWE for 13 years now, 15 if you want to count Fake Diesel & Issac Yank’Em. He’s been a strong mid-card/main event guy for quite a while. He isn’t a horrible wrestler, but he certainly isn’t known for any classics. So, why on Earth he got a DVD set, let alone THREE discs is beyond what anyone can rationalize.

I never planned to review this, because I’ve always thought it’s gonna be three discs of extreme mediocrity that punishes you with crap, and I’m not a masochist. However, this was requested because they wanted to see me tormented, so I was provided with the set, but had to provide my own bat to smash my face in when we’re in the middle of disc two.

  • Mankind vs. Kane
    Special Challenge Match

    Survivor Series – 11-9-97

    Kane had been reeking havoc in the ‘E since debuting a month prior. Well, who else could step up to the challenge but Mankind? It’s an alright outing, it’s weird seeing them wrestle under a red light, I’d completely forgot that Kane use to do all his rocking under a heat lamp. The match is decent, but honestly, nothing to write home about.
    Rating: * * 1/2th

  • Undertaker vs. Kane
    Wrestlemania XIV – 3-29-98This is easily one of the greatest booked feuds in wrestling history. For damn near 6 years, The Undertaker’s brother Kane was reeking havoc. Beating up whomever he pleased, all in an effort to get Taker to fight him. Countless face to face’s resulted in Taker refusing to fight his younger brother. However, after a while the Taker just couldn’t be Kane’s bitch anymore, and the stage was set for Wrestlemania. I’d been a massive Stone Cold fan since the week before Wrestlemania 13, and even though I knew he was finally going to win it, I was just a pinch more excited for Taker vs. Kane. Usually, with that kind of awesome build up, the match sucks. But these two really delivered. I don’t love it as much as I did I don’t love it as much as I did back when. Still good though
    Rating: * * * 1/2th
  • Undertaker vs. Kane
    Inferno Match

    Unforgiven – 4-26-98

    To see the pictures, this match looks awesome. Because they only would show when the flames jump high. To see it as it is, it’s a bid underwhelming. This match sucks, to be honest. These two are confined to the ring, and can’t do much. Plus, when Kane is burnt, it’s so obvious he has something protective on. I mean, c’mon. Couldn’t they have done something as simple as having The Undertaker break Kane’s hand the week before so he has a cast and set that on fire? Guess not.
    Rating: * *

  • Stone Cold Steve Austin [C] vs. Kane
    First Blood Match for the WWE Championship

    King of the Ring – 6-28-98

    This isn’t a bad match, but it isn’t awesome, either. Kane hadn’t really found his groove yet, and this brawl is a bit of a yawn. Plus, you have things like the cell coming up and down, and it’s a bit distracting. I do remember the next night watching Raw while playing Diablo. I was in a chat room when Stone Cold won and I just kept typing STONE COLD WINS!!! STONE COLD WINS!!! over and over. Needless to say, I was a massive mark.
    Rating: * * 1/4th

  • Jeff Jarrett & Owen Hart [C] vs. X-Pac & Kane
    World Tag Team Championship Match

    Raw – 4-5-99

    Ah, remember when X-Pac taught Kane how to love, as well as talk? Man, that was stupid. This match is nothing special.
    Rating: * *

  • X-Pac vs. Kane
    Steel Cage Match

    Armageddon – 12-12-99

    Eh, nothing really all that special here. Plus, it’s kind of confusing. Because you win a cage match via pin or submission, or climbing out, or going through the door. However, the door rule is omitted this time, and we don’t know that. So, it’s a bit weird to just see Kane saunter out and grab X-Pac before he leaps to the ground.
    Rating: * * 1/4th

  • Chris Jericho vs. Kane
    Last Man Standing Match

    Armageddon – 12-10-00

    It’s hard to screw up a LMS match. However, this one just isn’t that great. This DVD is really becoming a chore, man. I do dig the ending though. Also, didn’t this feud start because Jericho spilled coffee on Kane? What, was the idea of Jericho laying a finger on Kane’s Butterfinger just too lame?
    Rating: * * 3/4th

  • The Dudley Boyz vs. Edge & Christian & The Brothers of Distruction
    Table Match for the World Tag Team Championship

    No Way Out – 2-25-01This match is pretty decent. They mix up the teams in order to not make thing so damn cluttered and confusing, and they mash up all the teams here and there just to change shit up. Table matches are always great because anyone can win, and, you get to see someone go through a table. Score, son.
    Rating: * * *

    DISC 2

  • Triple H [C] vs. Kane
    Chain Match for the Intercontinental Championship

    Judgment Day – 5-20-01

    Ah, it’s Triple H in his super, super prime when he was part of the Two Man PowerTrip. Plus, it’s a hardcore match. So, it’s gotta rock, right? Meh. Fuckers, I’m not enjoying this set at all. This must be the 6th layer of hell….
    Rating: * * 1/2th

  • Kurt Angle vs. Kane
    Wrestlemania X8 – 3-17-02

    It’s Kurt. So bottom line, you know you’re going to get the goods. It’s really a shame that Angle and Flair never had a good go round, I think it’d rule. Speaking of things that rule, this match does as well. Angle kicks ass, per usual, and carries Kane to one of the gems from Wrestlemania X8
    Rating: * * * 1/2th

  • Triple H [C] vs. Kane [C]
    World Heavyweight Title vs. Intercontinental Title

    Here’s how it goes; The WWE Champ was on Smackdown, and they wanted to make the IC title the main strap on Raw. Well, Triple H felt that was beneath him, so he need a vanity belt to boost his ego, hence the digging up of the World Heavyweight Title. This was during Triple H’s long, loooong reign as Champ of Crappy Matches. He’d own that title until Wrestlemania 22, where I believe he started having great matches on a consistent basis. As opposed to 95% crap, and the occasional great bout.
    Rating: * *

  • Chris Jericho & Christian vs. Rob Van Dam & Kane
    Raw – 1-6-03

    There’s really no point in having this match, to be honest. It isn’t bad, however, just no real reason to have it on here.
    Rating: * * 1/4th

  • Rob Van Dam vs. Kane
    Steel Cage Match
    Raw – 9-8-03

    This was fresh off Kane becoming an unstoppable monster. Again. He was burning & tombstoning people left and right, and he was going to burn down the WWE..or something to that effect. This was alright, but would have been better served on the PPV.
    Rating: * * 3/4th

  • Shane McMahon vs. Kane
    Last Man Standing Match

    Unforgiven – 9-21-03

    Now, the feud for this may have been asinine as all hell, but here it is, ladies & gentlemen; Kane’s greatest match. This was such a fantastic brawl. They took it from the ring to the entrance where Kane attempted to dump the announcer table on him. Great stuff.  Naturally, Shane brings it home with a crazy, crazy spot that I assume you’re not going to find most sons of a billionaire doing. It’s funny that Shane is a better wrestler than David Flair. Anyways, great match, kids, great match
    Rating: * * * *

  • Shane McMahon vs. Kane
    Ambulance Match

    Survivor Series – 11-16-03
  • I was looking forward to it once I watched the LMS, however, this one tended to fall a little short. It isn’t a terrible match by any means, I was just hoping for a bit more. Still, very much worth checking out.
    * * * 1/4th
  • Matt Hardy vs. Kane
    Till Death Do Us Part Match

    SummerSlam – 8-15-04

    The only thing good that came about from this feud was the fact we eventually got to see Trish Stratus in a white lingerie git up. Matt was made to look like a real bitch, and Lita was made to look like a real slut. Of course, she eventually fell in love with her rapist, Micheal Berryman. Meh
    Rating: * *

    Goddamn, unless you’re a massive Kane fan, you’re not going to find any real gems here. However, there is some good, such as the discs really span his career, giving us a really great look at high points, as well as the low and outlandish ones [lighting JR on fire.] Hopefully I’ll have Disc 3 up within a week or so. I’ve just got to chug down the last few. Having to watch these is basically like taking a huge kick in the ol’ entertainment balls, and my junk is being set up for the Randy Orton punt. So, for Disc 1 & 2, I’ll give’em a review of * *


~ by Caliber Winfield on July 4, 2010.

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